Zia's Caffe in Kaneohe, HI

When your backdrop is a volcano and you are on an island one rogue wave away from being Atlantis, it is hard to say if you will even be alive tomorrow, so why worry about petty details like whether or not your friendly neighborhood cafe is hiding a dirty secret past.

But hey, this alleged UTBAPH has an upstairs. Pizza Huts didn't have an upstairs. 

Get it together, man! Don't let this facade fool you. You are smarter than that. Or, at least, your mom tells everyone you are.

Despite the extra fancy paint job by David, the submitter, to make that look like real brick on the second floor, the "upstairs" is faker than my interest in whatever people are talking about at parties other than old Pizza Huts.

I am not saying that this isn't a nice place -- it may well be. Just make sure you know what you are getting into with this one. Who knows what other secrets they are hiding. *coughdeadbodiesinthefreezercough*

Nero's in Gosnells, Australia

Don't let the big "Now Open" sign fool you. Nero's, sadly, is closed. But fear not, Gosnellians. I am told that a new place has opened up in this spot that is Indian/Italian. Yes, you read that right, and no, I have literally no idea what that could possibly mean. Tandoori Chicken Cacciatore? Curry Alfredo? Pasta Biryani? Maybe the submitter, Mike, can shed some light.

Whatever the hell it is, our team of researchers is working hard to get an updated photo of this place. We will keep you posted.

Le Peep Restaurant in Shrewsbury, NJ

Submitted by Dave

Update:

This is now a Nails Plus:

Regino's in Norfolk, VA

Not a bad showing here. No roof hump, but the angled windows are intact. Overall, C+.